The 4 words you should stop saying

When you are suffering from an unhealthy habit, there are four very familiar words that have more than likely been going through your mind often enough to make you feel weak, guilty and miserable.In my book Addiction Farewell the first piece of advice I give you is to delete this little phrase from your vocabulary. And for a very good reason.

“I want to quit”. To those suffering from unhealthy habits, this one small phrase is like an obsession all by itself. Whether you are eating too much or too little, smoke, use or hurt yourself in ways that harm you or others, these are the words that make you feel even more miserable than you already do. When you want to put an end to your habit and it does not happen, it will negatively affect your self-image. You think you are a failure, a loser. And a negative self-image lies at the root of your problems in the first place (see other posts in this blog).

There is another disadvantage to these words. Each time you think or say them, it will reinforce your belief, your conviction that you are unable to  stop. So, forget this short sentence. Delete it, ban it from your mind, from your vocabulary. Never say the words “I want to quit” again.

You may consider this a strange exaggeration, but think logically. Albert Einstein once said: “insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. If in spite of saying these words for weeks, months or even years, you are still suffering from your unhealthy habit, then what is the point… There is no logical reason whatsoever to do so. So let’s agree that you will stop using these words. Deal?

The same goes for the obsessive use of phrases like “I want to lose weight”, “I want to be happy”,  “Nobody loves me” or any other phrase that confirms the believe that you are in lack or that you are not perfect. The truth is that we are all perfect; your negative self-image is an illusion.